Matthias is 2!

Hello baby,

Mummy's letter to you is late. Sorry baby, your little sister is quite a handful.

My dear Matthias, 2 years ago you came into my life. Mummy was never a baby lover, but you were so chubby, so happy and so adorable. As the days went past, mummy slowly but so certainly fell in love with you.

Last year, you were hospitalised for 12 days. It gave me and Papa such a scare. We hope never to see you in that dazed state again.

Last year you also started going to school. At the beginning, mummy thought you would never adapt. Alas, you are so adaptable you stopped crying after 3 weeks. You started enjoying school (mostly the toys I suspect). Nonetheless, mummy is happy you liked going to school, even if it was just to play.

This year, I switched your childcare and at the beginning you cried again. And miraculously after 3 weeks you would run into school, dragging your bag behind you. Papa is so perplexed he thinks you 没良心 coz you don't even bother to say goodbye to him.

Mummy loves fetching you from school. Seeing your face light up, and your uber-sweet smile, and you running to get your bag and all, it warms my heart.

Nowadays you know how to say quite a number of words. Me and Papa are so proud. Even 鼻子!

You have begun throwing tantrums too (start of your terrible two?), especially when we don't give you what you want. It's ok, mummy will try to be more patient.

My dear boy, you are my heart, my soul. Even though you have a little sister now, you will always be my firstborn, the love and light of my life.

Thank you, thank you for coming into our lives 2 years ago. Thank you for all the joy and laughter you have brought into our lives. Thank you for being so understanding about your little sister. Please stay happy, healthy and adorable. Mummy and Papa love you very very very much.

Follow Up Appointment #1

Went back to KKH for his first follow-up appointment since his discharge. Unfortunately he started having a fever in the morning. I took his temp and it was 37.7. When we reached the hospital his temperature was 37.9.

Anyway went to take blood and had a urine bag attached to him coz they wanted a urine test done too. My appointment was supposed to be at 9.10am, but because of the blood test results I only saw the doctor around 12pm. M was especially cranky that day but thankfully when he went in to see the doctor he was relatively calm (except when they made him lie down on the bed to check him).

Anyway the Rheumatologist (Kawasaki Disease Doctor) was very pleased with his blood test results. His inflammation markers were normal (means no more inflammation in him I suppose) and his haemoglobin levels were up to normal. The doctor used the word "excellent" to describe his blood test results.

She did ask though, whether his fingers have started peeling and I replied no. Frankly I'm not even 100% sure that he had kawasaki disease. So I asked whether the aspirin he's taking right now is harmful for him (in the event he really does not have KD), but she said because his heart vessels were dilated, the aspirin for now would do him good. And the dosage he's taking isn't that big anyways.

So that's that. Another KD follow-up appointment after his 2D echocardiogram in February 2017. Hopefully by then everything would be A-OK too.

Next follow-up appointment is next week, to meet with the Infectious Diseases Senior Consultant, for his adenovirus. Fingers crossed too everything's gonna be fine!

Discharged on 18/11/2016

Thankfully after the 2nd dose of IVIG, the fever subsided and stayed away. M continued to grow stronger and stronger. They took his blood on 17/11/2016 to test for adenovirus count, his inflammation markers and other stuff. His inflammation marker went down and his adenovirus count also decreased significantly. They saw that his red blood cells were decreasing though, so recommended a blood transfusion to boost his RBCs. End up on 17/11/2016 night he was given a blood transfusion.

On 18/11/2016 (Friday), the doctors came by to look at him and were very happy to see him almost back to his normal self. Alert, with good appetite, active. So they said we could go home that day. And we did!

Today is 23/11/2016, 5 days after his discharge from the hospital and thankfully the worst truly seems to be over.

However, every morning and every night, when I see him lying next to me on the bed, sleeping peacefully, I whisper "Thank you Lord." for now I really appreciate the fact that he is beside me, safe and sound. I have begun to pray more for him and with him. In time to come I hope to bring him to church and introduce him to God and His Word. It seems only right that I should introduce him to the person who saved him and kept him well-protected.

It was a very scary experience that I would not wish any parent to go through. I've bought hospitalisation plan for him, albeit it's a little too late for this episode but still, buying it now is better than not buying at all. Can't stress the importance of it to all my friends!

Second dose of IVIG

On 14/11/2016 (Monday), the doctors decided they would give him a second dose of IVIG. It was administered at night and treatment was completed at 3.45am on Tuesday morning.

The whole of Tuesday (15/11), he did not have any fever. So if by today (16/11) 3.45pm (36 hours after IVIG), and his fever does not return. Then his kawasaki disease is likely to be fully gone.

However, his adenovirus count is still high. It dropped from 5 to 4, based on the blood taken on 14/11. But a fully recovered person should have 0 in their blood. We are really reluctant to give him another dose of cidofovir, given its potential damages to his kidneys. We shall see what the doctors advise later.

Clinically, M is getting stronger, eating and playing more, sleeping less and is responsive to our questions. He would smile and laugh and babble some funny stuff. It makes us so so happy to see him slowly recover. He is no longer on drip nor on Ventolin puffs.

On 14/11, the doctors came by, listened to him and told us that he had an "extra heart sound", a gallop. We were devastated. It seemed like it never rains but it pours. He was sent for a 2D echo of his heart. Thankfully the doctor who saw him said it didn't seem to be anything serious. On 15/11, the doctors came by again, and they confirmed the extra heart sound is gone. One of them was relatively amazed and said to me,"I can't explain it."
I can. This is the power of God. For He is our Healer. Thank you Lord.

Day 11 of fever

Yesterday after I posted, I asked my friends to pray for M. Miraculously, in the afternoon, his fever declined, he even sat up and played and SMILED, for the first time in so many days. He had a little of his appetite back too. We were ecstatic. We thought and hope the worst is over.

Today his fever came back a little. It's 38.3 now and I'm waiting for the doctor to come and assess him. He also seems very tired and lethargic and has trouble breathing. Everytime he stirs in his sleep and the oxygen mask is too far from his face, his oxygen level would drop to 89 (should be able to maintain 95 on his own).
He hasn't eaten or drank anything since 6plus last evening. Though he is on drip but the missing appetite worries me again.

I shall update further after the doc comes. Whatever it is, thank you God for lowering his temperature. Thank you thank you thank you.

Update on 14/11/2016 1.51am:

All through Sunday night M did so well. His fever totally subsided, he was awake for hours, he played and ate. The hubs and I were doing somersaults and feeling veey upbeat and positive. We thought the doctor would come in the morning and clear him and allow him to be discharged on Tuesday.

Just a few minutes ago his fever came back up again, to 38.8. His heart rate is also really super fast now, about 160-170+, compared to the ideal one of 120-130, which he managed to achieve earlier in the evening.

I'm not a doctor, so I can't say why his fever is back but it does not bode well. He's also coughing a lot more again even though throughout Sunday he didn't cough much at all. We'll just have to wait and see how he progresses through tonight ans hope for the best, then wait for the doctors to assess him tomorrow morning.

I wanted to whatsapp the hubs but I decided not to. Why make him as heartsick as I am? I shall just keep praying for a miracle to happen.

Day 10 of fever

Yesterday they gave M the antiviral drug, cidofovir. However, his fever did not go down today and he still hasn't improved.

Later, the rheumatologist is coming to assess him to see if he needs another dose of IVIG for the Kawasaki Disease.

We keep expecting to see improvements in him and his fever, but we keep bumping into walls and nothing seems to be working.

I am at a loss. Don't know what to think, don't know what to say. It seems as though he's slipping through our fingers but that's just the pessimist in me speaking. I am so scared. Scared beyond words. I keep thinking the worst although I know I'm supposed to stay positive. I just pray the Lord will be merciful to my firstborn, my one and only, and heal him.

To the Lord, it is as simple as lifting his littlest finger but to me it means the world.

Please God. Please.

Our journey with Kawasaki Disease and Adenovirus

It started off simple enough, M had a cough and runny nose. The cough was not significant so I didn't think too much of it. Over the week it got worse. Finally on 31 Oct (Monday), the hubs suggested we bring him to the PD. Doc said no wheezing in his lungs so we were sent home with zyrtec and terbutaline.

On Thursday, M's childcare called me to tell me he was running a fever of 37.9 degrees. Brought him home and over the next few days, his fever went up and down. Going as high as 39.4 and as low as 37.6.

On Sunday, having seen his fever continue to spike over 39, we decided to bring him to KKH A&E to do blood test. A chest xray was also done. Doc mentioned he seems to have a bit of lung infection, so we were sent home with antibiotics.

On Monday (7 November), he slept and slept and slept. I brought him back to A&E and he was promptly admitted for lung infection.

On Tuesday, we were informed he has adenovirus, which is a common enough virus and gives people a cold/flu, but it hit M harder than usual. So it has infected his lungs.

Over the next few days, he just continued to deteriorate in front of our eyes. He would sleep for hours on end, wake up but just lie there. Didn't want to eat or drink. It was extremely painful to watch.

On Thursday, doctors confirmed he has Kawasaki Disease, and recommended he be given a dose of IVIG. The dose ended today (Friday 11 November) at 2am. His fever, however, did not subside like it was supposed to. He did not make any significant improvements like other KD patients.

Blood test was done again and his inflammatory markers have gone up. His lungs sounded worse than before. His fever is still lingering around 38.5. Now we are waiting for the blood test for adenovirus count to come back.

Either way it's not looking good for M simply because he is not showing any sign of improvement. Either they are going to start antiviral drugs (that can cause toxicity to his kidneys) to control the adenovirus, or they are going to give him another dose of IVIG.

It's really really painful to watch. To watch him be this sick, this sad. I hope he's too young to understand why he is going through all these poking and feeding of medications. I hope these things done in the hospital has no lasting effects on him.

I want to have my happy M back...I've prayed a lot and am holding on to faith with dear life. Because that's the only thing I have left. I try to tell myself God will heal him in His time, but I can't help crying buckets everytime I see him and remember my happy boy...

Wow

It's been really long since I've written here. I seldom have time for myself these days, what with work and baby M.
Baby M is 11 months old! Time flies and he's gonna be 1 in 2 weeks' time. So amazing. He has been amazing and it has been an amazing journey so far.
What's more amazing is that I am expecting baby no 2...we planned for it, but didn't expect a one-time bingo. I am now 5w2d but this time round I am more slack..planning to go gynae when I am around 8 weeks...
Part of me still lives in denial and can't believe the fact that I am pregnant. The other part is ecstatic that I'm dying to reach 3 months so I can tell the world :D

Things DO get better

Everyone told me things would get better and yes I believed them.

Like, baby M has finally learned to sleep through the night. Actually he managed that from 3mths + onwards. Though he would still stir during his sleep at night so I still wake up maybe once or twice to pat him back to sleep. The longest stretch of non-interrupted sleep I had was 5 hours and it was such a treat.

Baby M is smiling more, laughing more, making funny sounds, screaming, rolling over these days. He's a joy to watch. It is amazing to watch him grow and pick up new skills, or reach new developmental milestones. I remember the hubs and I were so amazed when he first learned to roll over. Nowadays we are wishing he would roll over less though lol.

However, baby M has been drinking less and less milk. We used to feed him 170ml every 3 hours, but these days he doesn't finish the 170ml at one go like he used to. Instead, we have to separate it into 2 feedings (within 1 hour). Most times, he finishes the remaining during the second feed but there would still be times when he wouldn't. We've also started stretching his feed to 3.5-4 hours. Mainly because he just doesn't seem hungry. We are actually quite puzzled over this as well and would want to check with the PD at his next vaccination.

What is comforting is that he's still gaining weight (he's a proud 9.1kg baby at 4 months 3 weeks!), pooping regularly (once a day) and playing/laughing/smiling as usual. So I'm not too uptight.

I'm back at work so will get a chance to blog more in future. Moving to new house soon though so gonna be busy for a while! Once baby M starts his solids when he touches 6 months, I suppose there would be tonnes of things to share and review! :)

What no one told you about motherhood

When people talk about their children, there's a sparkle in their eyes, a lift in their steps and a smile at the corner of their mouths. As Baby M approaches the 4 month mark, here's writing down what I wished someone told me about motherhood.

1. It's a lonely journey.
I have friends who have children. In fact, my closest girlfriends all have kids. But somehow when you are awake at 3am in the morning, it just seem like it would be rude to start whatsapping them. There would be worries, and I am not the kind of person to bug others at every small little thing. So you keep your worries to yourself and google like your life depended on it and end up scaring yourself silly.

2. You CAN over-google.
Google is my best friend. It still is, though now I've learned to take everything it says with a pinch of salt. Baby M's front fontanelle was a little sunken in. Concerned, I asked Google. It replied that baby was probably dehydrated which scared me shitless but ended up baby is quite well-hydrated and it is perhaps somewhat normal for the fontanelle to be a little sunken in (and pulsing).

3. It's scary.
Before Baby M came out I rehearsed in my mind and thought it didn't sound all that difficult. After all, there are billions of mothers in the world, how hard can it be? The truth is, when you are faced with a shrieking, wriggling, red-faced angry baby, it can be frigging scary. You start wondering what you are doing wrong, is the baby having a fever, is he in pain, does he hate me etc.

It's worse if you have an unsupportive other half who doesn't help much.

4. It's damn bloody tiring.
Spending the entire day entertaining a baby is no joke. There are only so many things I can think of to talk about, there are only so many stories and songs I can read and sing. Not to mention the night feeds. An 8-hour sleep is a thing of the past. If you're reading this and have not yet given birth, my best advice to you is: SLEEP. You'll miss it.

Of course, motherhood is not all bad. In fact, it is extremely lovely. I just wished I was better prepared mentally and emotionally. The good definitely outweighs the bad and you will catch yourself falling so in love with your little one that you don't know what hit you.

Just keep reminding yourself that things will keep getting better. The days when baby is cranky and you are exhausted, just tell yourself that "this too shall pass". Like my friend told me: Eventually, no matter how cranky, upset they are, they eventually fall asleep.

So yeah, hang in there. Oh and don't beat yourself up if you can't breastfeed due to low supply like me. It doesn't make me or you less of a mother. According to my friend who breastfed her three children: breastfeeding is bullshit and over-rated.

Motherhood has a super steep learning curve so give yourself a break and don't be too hard and harsh on yourself. No one is perfect but we're all on a learning journey. Oh and it's quite normal if your wriggly baby slips into the water in the tub during bath time. And don't worry about that mouthful of water he swallowed, unless you put A LOT of soap into the water, otherwise chances are he's gonna be just fine. :)0

Formula Milk Review 3 - Nan Ha and Nan Pro

So Similac TC gave my baby greenish poo, S-26 Gold made my baby gassy. Desperate, I asked my girlfriend what she gave her baby, she told me Nestle's Nan.

I zoomed to the supermarket to buy but unfortunately there was Nan Ha and Pro. After considering, Ha stands for Hypoallergenic and seems to be better for sensitive tummies so I got that. Plus, it is more expensive than Nan Pro which has got to mean it is better right?

Wrong.

Baby's greenish poo came back, together with the ultra-smelly-can-kill farts.

Girlfriend told me Ha is the wrong one to buy, that I should buy Pro. I was upset at having wasted another $50 and was very skeptical about buying Nan Pro..i thought of just trying Enfa immediately but I thought "what the hell" and took my friend's advice.

Praise God she was right. Nan Pro brought back the yellow poo and made me a happy mummy once again.

Soon after, a girlfriend also told me she bought Nan Ha and her baby has green poo. I told her to buy Nan Pro and a week later when I saw her again she said her baby's poo has also gone back to being yellow.

Not sure why such differences exist between milk powders but yeah so far baby's drinking Nan Pro and he's a happy baby! :)

Formula Milk Review 2 - S-26 Gold

As my previous entry mentioned, Similac TC gave my baby dark green poop. The hubs asked me to let baby try S26 Gold as it has the highest DHA content among all formula milk powders.

It did change my baby's poop from dark green to a yellowish mustard colour (normal poop). However, my baby seemed to be extremely gassy while he was drinking that.

He would cry (more like scream/wail) for quite a fair bit every day, and as he cried we either heard or felt (by placing our hand on his diaper) him passed gas numerous times. After that his crying would subside. His crying was quite bad to the extent that tears would flow down his eyes and he was practically inconsolable. All the massages we learnt online to help him pass gas didn't work. Those few weeks (we tried 3 tins i think) he mostly cried himself to sleep. Like he would cry until he was tired and finally drift off to sleep with tears glistening on his eyelashes. It was quite painful to watch.

So I told the hubs that this can't continue and we need to change formula again.

Next review - Nan Ha and Nan Pro.

Formula Milk Review 1 - Similac Total Comfort

The first formula milk we ever gave our baby was Similac Total Comfort. The hubs felt that since it costs so much it must be good! We also weren't sure what suited our baby so it seemed like a good choice as it was supposed to be gentle on the stomach.

Alas, it gave my baby dark green poop! We were scared shitless (pardon the pun) and the PD (Paediatrician) said it was due to too much iron that the baby is unable to digest fully. Though the PD did say it wasn't much to worry about but still.

Given its hefty price tag ($67+ per tin from NTUC) it was annoying to find out that it wasn't suiting my baby well.

We switched formula after baby finished that first tin. Next review will be on S-26 Gold.

Disclaimer: Each baby is different and the above review is purely based on my baby and is not meant to discount the brand nor the formula. I have heard of babies who thrive on Similac TC.

Noob Mother Entry #1 - Mt Alvernia Hospital Review + Day One to Six

So I gave birth at Mt Alvernia Hospital. I have to say that overall I was quite satisfied with the services there. Of course, not all things were perfect. For instance, majority of the nurses in Our Lady's Ward were experienced and good, except for one or two. One hurt me by using her sharp nail to poke my very sore nipple when she was trying to unlatch my baby (sorry TMI) and some others were just quite heck care I felt.

The food was not bad, I had a two-bedded room and thank God I brought my ear plugs. I tell you, every hospital bag should have ear plugs, unless you are staying in a one-bedded room. My first neighbour would call up her mum and talk to her on speaker phone at like 7am in the morning. She also didn't know how to whisper so she was constantly talking at her normal voice...even at 12am at night. My second neighbour was the most powerful snorer I have ever met. I consider the hubs' snoring quite powerful, but this lady thrashed him by a mile. Seriously, I would have wept if I didn't have my ear plugs.

Anyway baby stayed in hospital an additional day because his jaundice level was 11.9 so I stayed too.

The next day, baby's jaundice dropped to 10.8 and the Paediatrician allowed him to go home. :D

Day One - With the hubs around it wasn't so bad. Things seemed manageable and it felt ok to not feel ok because it was baby's day one back home with us. I just thought we needed some getting used to. Didn't sleep because baby didn't want to sleep. Gave him a pacifier and whenever it dropped out of his mouth (which happened like every 5 mins), he would be startled and would wake up and start wailing. I had to find the pacifier in the dark and popped it back into his mouth every 5 mins. It was pure torture. Until I dozed off at 5plus am and awoke with a start at 6plus thinking "Why isn't there any sound?" only to see that he has fallen into a deep sleep, pacifier forgotten.

Day Two - Bathed the baby for the first time. Goodness he screamed like I was about to murder him. My baby hates baths. The hubs took half day and it wasn't so bad. Still didn't manage to get enough sleep.

Day Three - Brought him to Paediatrician on my own. Thankfully he slept throughout the journey there, throughout the wait at the clinic. Only when the PD unswaddled him did he start screaming. Which meant I only heard about a third of what the PD said because it was so disconcerting to see the baby crying until he turned red as the fire hydrant. After I changed his soiled diaper and fed him at the clinic, he slept again on the way home. Phew.

Day Four - Went to gynae to check my wound. Quite scared to leave him alone at home with the mum-in-law. So rushed to gynae and rushed back. Managed to buy one Gong Cha though which really made my day.

Day Five - Major meltdown. Baby kept crying and crying and crying and crying and crying. I don't know what he wants. He has been fed, burped, changed, rocked, carried but on and on he went. I am so tired I hated him then. Ok maybe hate is too strong a word but I was seriously getting quite sick of this screaming, wailing creature. Like, WHAT DO YOU WANT?! When the hubs called, I broke down and cried. When the hubs returned at night and asked me about this and that I flared up at him, then started crying in the room again. Sigh. To top things off, little one didn't sleep until 3+ am, because he refused to let me swaddle him so he kept jerking and startling himself awake. -_-"

Day Six - So far so good. Have established a minor routine whereby the baby sleeps soundly only from about 3-4am onwards, but continues to sleep soundly in the morning until about 10am. So after I wake the hubs up for work, I go back to sleep until 10am. Follow baby's timing. He's quite cranky today too so hopefully he will be sleepy later at night.

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Things I have learnt so far:

1. It's ok if you don't have enough breast milk. It doesn't make you any less of a mother. All mothers want the best for their children but if we don't have breastmilk then so be it. The fact that there's formula milk in the market meant there are millions of mothers in this world who don't have breastmilk as well. It's not a crime and it doesn't mean we love our children any less. Don't stress over this.

This was toughest for me as I was adamant during pregnancy that to save money and for the baby's sake I would DEFINITELY breastfeed. Goes to show that you really shouldn't speak so early. I cried buckets in the hospital because I didn't have enough breastmilk and also because both my nipples bled so I couldn't let baby latch on or even pump (whatever I had pumped out had to be thrown away but then again, the amount was so pathetic it wouldn't have filled a quarter of my baby's tummy).

2. Pregnancy was the easy part. Taking care of the baby is the hard part, especially because he can't communicate. They say communication is a two-way traffic, but when it comes to communicating with the baby, it's basically a dead-end. He can't understand you and you can't understand him.

Be prepared for sleepless nights, sleepless days and endless frustrations. Be prepared to become a totally sleep-deprived zombie. Be prepared for endless diaper changes, for endless pees and poos. Be prepared for feedings after feedings after feedings. Be prepared to wake up bleary-eyed but be expected to function. You will become an expert milk-making machine (or you will become a cow). Either way, be prepared to see your boobies real often (either from breastfeeding or pumping).

P/S: If your baby refuses to sleep at night and you are forced to stay awake and you're on the verge of crying, just keep telling yourself that he HAS GOT TO SLEEP sometime within the next few hours and that's when you can catch your break too. I did this last night and it helped.

3. You NEED to join a support group. I joined a group on Facebook that had all the ladies who were going to give birth in February 2015 and this group has proven to be such a major pillar of support. Support groups are important because you then realise that you are not in this alone. Whatever you are facing, there are many others out there who are either facing the same issue or has it worse. In addition, these mummies are a great source of information and help.

4. Talk to the husband for support. Believe me when I say that your quality time with the husband would seriously go down the pits. Whatever time you have is either spent with the baby or spent resting. Honestly I don't even have much energy left to talk/chat with the husband, unlike the good old days when we would snuggle together and spend some time together. But I believe that as long as both parties put in the effort, things would still be great and days spent together can still be romantic.

5. Don't be ashamed to ask for help and don't be stubborn to ask for help either. I was very against asking mum-in-law for help because (1) I don't like her much and (2) I was way too arrogant. Considering what a bitchy daughter-in-law I have been I feel quite ashamed of myself. Now I let her carry the baby whenever she wants and when she asked me to go into the room to rest while she carried the baby in the living room, I just do it. Used to be I would refuse as I didn't want baby to become more attached to her than to me, but now I just realised that I do no one any good if I am so tired and cranky that I am flaring up at everyone (the hubs, parents-in-law, the baby). So yeah she can carry the baby all she wants.

6. PRAY. For the baby and about the baby and for yourself. No matter how tough it is, I kept telling myself that God wouldn't give me a trial that I cannot pass or go through.

This is an extraordinary journey with an exceptionally steep learning curve and I can only expect more ups and downs will come. Hopefully more ups! The besties tell me that the first 3 months are the toughest so yeah just gotta stick it out!

The birth story

It's been such a long while since I updated this blog...the pregnancy was smooth-sailing all the way until 39 weeks.

On the day I went 39+2, at 4am, I felt a little trickle down under as I was sleeping. Not quite sure what it was, I went to the bathroom to pee, only to stand up after that and feel water trickling down my legs. Thankfully the hubs also woke up so I told him we need to go to the hospital immediately.

At 4am, there wasn't much traffic and we reached there in record time. I was brought to the Delivery Suite to wait. Nurses came to give me enema (to clear my bowels) and I was strapped occasionally to the CTG machine which tracks baby's heartbeats and the contractions.

My gynae came by in the morning to check and I was only probably 0.5cm dilated. To cut a (really) long story short, I was given tablet x 2 and also oxytocin x 2 times to speed up dilation. I also asked for epidural sometime in the night as the contractions were starting to be really really painful. Unfortunately, but the next morning 8am when my gynae came, I was only 7cm dilated. He told me that my cervix walls are really thick and shows no signs of "softening". He says everytime they tried increasing the dosage of oxytocin, baby's heartbeat drops. It's been 28 hours since my waterbag burst so he asked whether we wanted to consider caesarean section.

By then, the hubs and I were both really tired and of course, concerned for the baby. Upon hearing the gynae's words I think our minds were made up pretty quick. We consented to caesarean section and I was pushed into the operating theatre shortly after. The thing was, I was given two dosages of epidural prior to the op so i think the anaesthetist could only estimate the amount that I was to be given. Which meant I wasn't completely, fully numb. I couldn't feel the cut, but I could feel the stretching, pulling, pushing etc and I just clung onto the hubs who was sitting next to me watching everything. While I clung, tears rolled down my face.

Thankfully, it was very fast, and the baby came out soon after. I was so tired and so relieved and it all felt a little surreal. Haha had I known C-sect would be so much faster I prob wouldn't have gone for natural. :P

The hubs was then tasked to follow the baby around while I was brought to the observation ward and made to lie there for a while. After that I was pushed to the ward where the hubs joined me.

So after 28 hours of labour, and an emergency C-sect, the baby, MY baby is finally out. :D I'm officially a mummy!

Week 31 updates

Wow it's been quite a long time since I last blogged. Been really busy at work but thankfully the peak period is almost over!

Baby M is at Week 31 now. I realised my gynae package, though cheap, is quite bo hua (not worth it) because the number of visits are not a lot, plus some of my friends' packages include meds but mine don't.

Anyway nowadays I feel ok, just more easily tired, plus my water retention is really bad. That day my feet were so swollen and my dog jumped onto my foot and I yelped in pain. It really hurts quite bad. Been trying to sleep with my legs propped up and occasionally the swelling subsides, but after one whole day at work it comes back. Even my fingers are swollen too.

We've finished buying all the big items for baby - stroller, changing station, playpen, baby seat, carseat, bouncer, carrier - all for $956! We bought at baby fair in December. Now it's the small stuff left and I have about 9 weeks to finish my shopping!

Have also thought of packing my hospital bag but a bit too lazy to start hehe.

Gynae package + mummy's insurance

So I forgot to add that after my detailed scan, my gynae finally made me sign the package. My gynae's package is $600 ($642 including GST) and includes scans, ultrasound photos, urine test. No meds or vitamins though. Anyway nowadays I've only been getting calcium pills from my gynae, I've been getting my multi-vitamins and fish oils from Watsons or Guardians.

So now the baby kicks rather regularly. Sometimes he would kick during the day, more often at night. There have been times when I've been woken up at 6am by his kicks but I still love it. Feeling the baby's kicks/movements is one of the greatest, most miraculous joys of pregnancy. I have this little trick of changing sides when I am lying down so as to feel him kick. I would lie down on my right side for about 5-10 mins and after that switch sides. Usually the baby responds. :)

I read online that it is better to sleep on your left side rather than your right as the right side is where the inferior vena cava is (that's the artery that carries oxygenated blood to the baby). Been sleeping a lot on my left sometimes the entire night. It is not the most comfortable sleeping position (imagine staying on the same side throughout the night) so sometimes I will sleep on my back but that is somewhat uncomfortable too. Ah well, 3 more months to go!

I bought an insurance plan for myself (during pregnancy and childbirth) and the baby (up to 3 years old) from OCBC. It is the only plan (I think) in the market that does not come with an ILP. It protects mothers from 8 pregnancy complications, protects the baby from 18 congenital diseases and covers certain hospitalisation (eg. from dengue) for the baby up to 3 years old. Of course, the coverage is not much, for the $659 plan (which is the one I took up), you are only paid $5000 in the event of pregnancy complications. It is not a lot, but definitely better than nothing? And of course, everyone buys such plans with the hope of never putting it to the test or utilising it. The plan is called MaxMaternity Care and they let me purchase although I am not an existing OCBC customer, but the condition is that I have to open the CDA account for the baby with OCBC.

Well, just sharing in case some mummies are looking for something like that :)

Our baby journey - Pregnancy Myths & Old Wives' Tales

I feel that I am a very scientific person. I am agreeable to a lot of things, only if they have been scientifically proven to make sense. Those things that have no logic, I refuse to listen to and so here are a list of myths/old wives' tales that I've heard about pregnancy so far but have disregarded.

Myth #1: No cold drinks or food

This is quite nonsense. I've been eating iced ching tng, drinking coke, soft drinks, ribena, iced milo and eating ice cream like countless times throughout this pregnancy. So far so good. The fact is, by the time the cold water travels down your oesophagus and to your tummy, it is already warmed up. I salute those women who can tahan (endure) not drinking cold drinks in Singapore's crazy weather.

Myth #2: Do not consume cooling foods

Erm I haven't been following this as well. In fact during the first trimester I drank quite a bit of grass jelly (I prefer that to soya bean). Even now, I am still eating a slice of watermelon every day. I believe that in everything, moderation is key. Just don't go swallowing the entire watermelon. In fact, westerners advocate eating watermelon for its high water content.

Myth #3: If your stomach is round, it's a girl and if it is pointy, it's a boy

In the first place, I've never seen a pointy stomach. Secondly, many people commented that my belly was round...but I am still having a baby boy.

Myth #4: Take more tonics to 补 your body

I don't believe in TCM so much, which is ironic given that both my uncle and aunt are TCM Practitioners. I just feel that there are a lot of unknowns about TCM that I would rather not take the risk. I don't take ginseng (scientifically proven to be bad for the foetus), nor bird's nest. Also all the other herbs like Danggui or whatever. The only thing I would possibly willingly eat is probably Chicken's Essence, and that's because I like the taste of Chicken Essence. Hehe

These are all I can think of for now. I will update if there are more! Hope this entry helps to put some mummies' hearts at ease (especially if you thought you've committed the unforgivable crime of eating watermelon)! :)

Our baby journey - Detailed scan

Two days ago, we went for our detailed scan at Mt Alvernia Hospital. We were naturally very excited because we were about to find out whether we belonged to Team Pink or Blue.

Our appointment was at 10.30am, so we reached right on the dot, informed the counter staff who gave me a queue number. It was indicated on the number slip that the waiting time was about an hour so the hubs and I went to grab some food at the cafe. After which, we went down to Basement 1 to wait again and soon it was our turn.

First thing the hubs told the radiologist (or whatever you call those people who do the ultrasound scans for you), was that we wanted to know the gender. She replied, sure she'll take a look and soon enough as she was scanning, she saw the penis hahaha and informed us it's a boy! Team Blue!

She then went on to take photos of the baby's four limbs (both upper and lower portion), abdomen, heart, brain, kidneys, spine, foetal profile, eyes, nose and lips. She said the fingers and toes are too small to count but we did manage to see them and they looked perfect! Overall she said baby is healthy which was a huge huge relief for us. The scan took about 45 mins (depending on how cooperative your baby is).

She said she would send the photos back to my gynae and he will review them with me at my next visit, which is this Friday. :)

Meanwhile, the hubs had already posted our baby's penis on Facebook for the world to see. -_-"

Now the important thing is to think of a name for him! :)

Our baby journey - The essential fish oil

The fish oil my gynae gave me has finally finished. The clinic charged me $70 for each bottle, which lasted me exactly one month.

So I went to get my own and this brand came very highly recommended.

I like that I only have to take one capsule a day, instead of two capsules which the one my gynae gave me required me to take. This brand also has quite low EPA which is good.

This small little bottle contains 30 capsules, which also lasts me an entire month, but this bottle only costs $45.50 (from Watsons). 

So I saved $24.50 every month. *beams* (It's even cheaper from hospital pharmacies I think)

I just googled it and realised this is a malaysian brand but online there are quite a number of mothers who recommended this so I shall just stick to it for now.